Archive for the ‘Sex’ Category

 

sacredhands on Oct 20th, 2007You Love The Beach Because You Evolved From the Ocean

Has it ever occurred to you that you love the beach so much because human beings actually evolved out of the ocean? New research suggests that our love of the beach might also have something to do with the fact that the ocean served as our meal ticket in the early days of our homo [...]

sacredhands on Oct 19th, 2007Rear Ends Stocking Stuffer By Roger Handy For Hard To Please Men

Looking for a stocking stuffer for that hard to please man this Christmas? Might we suggest Roger Handy’s (what a convenient name!) collection of found photographs of rear ends. Boating never looked so seductive from the rear end of a woman wearing a life preserver adjacent to an outboard motor. It almost makes us want [...]

sacredhands on Oct 18th, 2007Dating Life in Los Angeles Offers Scary Choices

It’s been a while since we scoped out singles ads on Craigslist. Here’s the most recent offering of over fifty women seeking men in the Los Angeles area. Hey guys, feel free to jump on a plane if something excites you like the poetry in ad #1:
I’ll sleep under your bed
and watch TV in the [...]

sacredhands on Oct 10th, 2007Newsflash! Cheerleaders Splash Water On Each Other In Boy’s Locker Room!

Self-distribution means just that. If you want to videotape yourself trying to parallel park and then post it to Youtube…you can. If you want to dress up like a cheerleader, making sure your bra top squeezes your best assets into cleavage fireworks, hoping to attract an internet audience…um, well, someone did. Watch without shame because [...]

sacredhands on Oct 5th, 2007Boys Learn the Meaning of Pudenda Kickball

Someone has a pretty funny (sick!) sense of humor. Watch as a couple of boys get their first glimpse of a pudenda and mock the birthing process, only to suddenly be called away to a kickball game. So much for raising responsible boys who grow up to become proud fathers…

sacredhands on Oct 5th, 2007Bob Barker Sexual Harrassment Suit Names Right Price

Bob Barker seems to have a problem with women. He’s being sued again for sexual harassment. The woman claims she “was exposed to sexual and mental harassment, abuse, and racial discrimination. Defendant Barker created an atmosphere of terror on the show, as a result of which any employee who complained about the working environment or [...]

sacredhands on Oct 4th, 2007Studio Heads in Hollywood Resemble Nursing Home Patients

Journalist-slash-gossip-girl Nikki Finke thinks Hollywood studios are closer to nursing homes than Animal Houses filled with buffed and toned 20-year-olds looking to hook up with anyone promising to take their virginal career to the next level. She specifically says, “More and more executive suites are filled with over-fifty and over-sixty fogies, all aging, overcompensated, entrenched [...]

sacredhands on Oct 3rd, 2007Grandpa Dad Fred Thompson’s Wife Jeri is NOT an Older Man Dater Kind of Girl

© Fred Thompson
Jeri Thompson, the wife of Fred Thompson, you know, the guy pretending to run for president, would like y’all to know that she’s no trophy wife who rests on a pedestal in her husband’s bedroom. No sireee, she’s a bona fide wife and not some “older-man-dater kind of girl.” Glad you cleared that [...]

sacredhands on Oct 3rd, 2007Ted Koppel Smartest TV Man in Wife’s Bed

Who knew Ted Koppel was such a stud in bed…apparently his wife. Watch Ted relate how being on the cover of a famous magazine with the headline, “Smartest Man on Television” became a funny joke about Ted’s sexual prowess.
Watch Ted Koppel on Conan O’Brien

sacredhands on Oct 1st, 2007Marcia and Jan Brady Sittin’ in a Lesbian Brady Bunch Tree

You know, somehow it’s not shocking to learn that Marcia Brady and Jan Brady has an “incestuous” lesbian relationship during the Brady Bunch family value years. Maureen McCormick (Marcia) recently confessed to bedding Eve Plumb (Jan) while they both starred on the Brady Bunch. We’re just wondering if Peter found their vibrators and other such [...]

sacredhands on Sep 21st, 2007Dr. Pepper Schwartz Shakes a Little Prime Sex Into Your Relationship

Brace yourself, ladies, men’s testosterone peeks early but your hormones are just settling into their prime when you hit your 30’s. This makes for treacherous relationships. How you handle this romance seesaw may require the expert help of a relationship expert like Dr. Pepper Schwartz. Or, you could just embrace your cougar spirituality and bag [...]

sacredhands on Sep 19th, 2007Sex Before Marriage = No Respect Bucko

Street wisdom sometimes outshines the most intellectual dogma. Enjoy this clip of an opinionated woman who tells it like she’s never been shopping at Bergdorf Goodman in her short life.
Why stop there, though! Stop by Julia Allison’s blog and read the gritty details of her recent breakup with the founder of Vimeo. It makes for [...]

sacredhands on Sep 18th, 2007Dr. Ruth On Best Time of Day to Have Sex

Dr. Ruth Westheimer is still alive and dishing out sex advice. Who knew. Here she answers the important sex question of the day: “What Is The Best Time Of Day To Have Sex And What Is The Part In The House To Have It?” Feel free to ring up your grandchildren in college and tell [...]

sacredhands on Sep 11th, 2007Two-Foot Tall Pregnant Woman Ripley RIP

Experience they say forms the nature of our identity. The opportunity to be yourself is the holy grail. So with all due respect, check out this 2-foot tall pregnant woman. Is it possible the circumference of her belly might be longer than her height? The sad part: carrying the baby to full-term is pretty iffy. [...]

sacredhands on Sep 10th, 2007Fashion Week Buckeroo Model

© Christopher Peterson
We love our fashion week models, especially the ones who know how to ride the pony!!

sacredhands on Sep 7th, 2007Cleve Dixon Racks Up 11 Kids Who Reproduce 100 More

Ask any kid from a very large family how much of their parents’ attention they received growing up and you’re likely to get a frown. Birth order researchers tell us that every kid must discover a “strategy” for getting their parent’s attention. The problem: those kids who come first get first crack at the best [...]

sacredhands on Sep 4th, 2007Kelly Klein Milks Motherhood For Eggs-citing Family

The cost of milk is going up, up, up. For years farmers pleaded for higher prices and now they have them, but so do we, the consuming public. As a kid, milk came free, courtesy of momma; she was an all-you-can-drink milk dispenser that might even sing a little until the hunger subsided and it [...]

sacredhands on Aug 31st, 2007Vaginal Rejuvenation For Cosmetic Reasons Maybe Not So Tight

Go ahead. Stand in an open field and scream at the top of your lungs. Think anyone cares? Probably not, as long as you live out in the country. Move to the city, though, and plenty of people will tell you to shut up. What makes sense in the country doesn’t always make sense in [...]

sacredhands on Aug 23rd, 2007Kelsey Grammar on Chaos Insanity and Mayhem

Every once in awhile there’s nothing to be said. You just have to get out of the way of an onslaught of words that so clearly details an experience that you almost feel like your were present at the debauchery and can now brag about the experience as if it were your own. Here’s Kelsey [...]

sacredhands on Aug 23rd, 2007Sexually Active Seniors Boinking Like Bobbleheads

Okay, fess up. Somebody participated in a study of sexually active older adults. The study was just published and reveals that 3005 U.S. adults (1550 women and 1455 men) 57 to 85 years of age were queried about how often they felt the urge and whether they had any, um, performance problems. The oddest part [...]